越单纯越刻意

I often catch myself thinking and trying too hard. I'm not scheming all the time, sometimes my motives are really innocent. But the harder I try at proving my innocence, the more deliberate my actions become.

I'll play the actions and words over and over again in my head, until the point when I find them all too complicated and too likely to convey the wrong message, then I'll chuck the whole plan to the back of my head and pretend that I have never thought about it. I wonder if the thinking-then-chucking makes me a bigger "faker" than carrying out my intended plan.

The incident which triggered my thoughts on this- I was thinking if a simple act of showing concern can actually be inappropriate. I derived at a "yes" and so that's it, no concern shown.

Yes, I'm weird.